In many ways the enormity of this whole thing hit home again this morning. I had just given a presentation with regard to big cat rescue and rehabilitation, I then had a walk back to the tiny bungalow I am staying in here in Bardia. I thought about how it's going to be yet another Christmas away from family, I consoled myself with however incremental the gains are in proportion to effort, every meeting, every presentation, every kilometre walked from camera trap to camera trap, every cramped bus ride, every hairy motorbike moment, every seemingly endless jeep ride over narrow tracks with sheer drops of hundreds of metres, somehow means a step forward.
I look out and see a world that says it cares but doesn't really because if it did, big cats wouldn't be in this situation. I see a tweet from someone wearing a suit and tie in a western metropolis, taking aim at a poacher or at a revenge killing of a big cat that has taken either human or livestock. I meet the man earning one dollar a day to patrol an area in a buffer zone, trying to stop livestock grazing, keeping an eye out for poachers. I open my inbox to all sorts of mail, big cats the theme but personal agendas abounding. I get far more people wanting than giving, support is a fickle thing but there are a hard core of understanding souls, I whisper thanks in my mind.
The audience at the presentation are all highly experienced. Wardens, biologists, anti-poaching personnel, an eclectic group of conservationists. Every one knows the dire need for a rescue centre, a place where conflict and/or displaced big cats can be rehabilitated, maybe rewilded. It will be a place for wild animals with a fierce spirit. These are not captive cats waiting for their daily feed, they are highly evolved hunters, they are natural born killers. Tigers and leopards of this type are the result of nature evolving into perfect predators, confront them at your peril, being stared down and launched at by a big cat is something I don't have words for, it would be insulting to the experience.
The men in the audience know this. Human fatalities and economic hardship caused by livestock loss to big cats are issues that everyone in the room has had to deal with. The dozen or so men understand what is at stake, they know how big cats polarize, how these animals provoke wonder but also a spine chilling fear.
Everyone in the room knows how precious each individual big cat is, how it has got to that stage, that's something I don't need to mention. It's about solutions... and quickly.
I walk back and pass an old woman with five goats, the loss of one would hurt the family. I wonder how much the tweeter in the suit is spending on coffee. Far away tonight that man may read about tigers behind the safety of his tablet while here the goat owner will forage in forest to feed the herd. Different worlds and yet everyone expects.
A poacher and a wildlife trader will plan while an anti-poaching unit will feel the night chill in the jungle. Millions will hit like buttons or contribute online to the outrage culture. I will burn the midnight candle, and yes, it really is candlelight a lot of the time in this struggling country, because deep down, no matter how hard it is, how polarizing the subject, we have to have a rescue centre, we have to...